I Almost Quit My Business Because I Kept Looking at Everyone Else's
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It was a Saturday afternoon and I was drowning.
Six months of building my business "the right way." Following my Human Design. Honoring my energy as a Projector. Doing everything I was supposed to do.
And I was watching everyone else blow past me.
People who started after me were hitting five-figure months. Launching programs with 50 enrollments. Posting screenshots of their success while I sat there thinking: What the hell am I doing wrong?
So I did what any frustrated entrepreneur does. I made a list.
Post more. Post consistently. Start doing lives. Launch something new. Be more visible. Do more, be better, work harder.
I stared at that list and felt my chest tighten.
Every single thing on it was a generator strategy. Every single item was about doing more, being different, abandoning what actually works for me because it didn't look like what everyone else was doing.
I looked at that list and thought: Just no. Absolutely not.
Nobody tells you this about comparison, but it makes you abandon what actually works for you simply because it doesn't look like what you think success should look like.
You see someone else's timeline, someone else's strategy, someone else's energy type doing what they're designed to do, and you think there's something wrong with you because you can't do it the same way.
That stops now.
Why Comparison Destroys What You're Building
Comparison isn't just uncomfortable—it actively destroys your progress when you're building something.
It makes you question everything right before something's about to work. You switch strategies every two weeks and never give anything time to actually land. You waste energy on non-income producing activities that look productive but drain you completely. You abandon your natural pace simply because someone else is moving faster. You force yourself into strategies designed for completely different energy types.
Comparison is a time and energy black hole that gives you nothing in return except anxiety and self-doubt.
And the worst part? You don't even realize you're doing it.
My Projector Problem (That Everyone Has)
I'll be direct with you—I was comparing myself to generators and manifesting generators specifically.
They could post five days a week and maintain that pace, that volume, that consistency. They were designed to test and move quickly and build momentum through sheer sustainable energy.
I am not.
I tried posting five days a week, then three. I took courses. I made "strategic shifts" about colors and fonts and all these stupid little things that had zero impact except draining my energy.
And every minute I spent doing that was a minute I wasn't spending actually building.
Your comparison trap depends on your type:
Generators/Manifesting Generators: "I should be further along by now"
Projectors: "I'm not doing enough"
Manifestors: "I should have more consistent results"
Reflectors: "Everyone else has it figured out"
But the pattern is the same—you're comparing yourself to someone with a completely different energetic design and wondering why their path isn't working for you.
It's not going to work for you, and it's never going to work for you, simply because it's not yours.
What Actually Changed Everything
Within three months of looking at that list and deciding to stop, my business took off.
Not because I suddenly had a better strategy or figured out the secret formula, but rather I stopped wasting energy questioning whether I was doing it right.
I stopped comparing myself to generators. I stopped trying to post like them, launch like them, build like them.
I found my own lane and committed to staying in it.
What that actually looked like for me was starting this podcast, which gave me a way to share my voice that didn't drain me—no lives, no YouTube, just me talking about what I love in a way that works with my energy.
I stopped making micro-shifts to my strategy every time I saw someone else doing something different.
I measured success by my own metrics instead of someone else's timeline.
And the results? Two discovery calls this week with new clients. A year ago I was wondering when anyone would ever talk to me.
The business is sustainable now and I actually look forward to the work instead of dreading it.
Try This: Your Own Success Metrics
Before you close this post, do this:
List three wins from the past three months that have nothing to do with money or metrics.
Maybe you showed up authentically when you were scared. Maybe you held a boundary you would have broken before. Maybe you trusted yourself instead of asking someone else's opinion.
Write them down.
That's your real progress. That's what actually matters.
What This Actually Requires
I'm not going to tell you this is easy.
When you stop comparing yourself and commit to your own lane, you have to resist the urge to look sideways every single time you scroll.
You have to trust your pace when someone else is moving faster.
You have to believe your way is valid even when it looks nothing like the "proven path."
But what I'd like you to understand is that you're exactly where you need to be to learn what you need to learn and see your next step.
There is no "behind" in an aligned business model.
You're building at a pace that's correct for you, for your life circumstances, for your energy, for your design.
Stop trying to force yourself into someone else's timeline.
Your pace is perfect for you. Your path is perfect for you. Stay in your lane.
Listen to the Full Episode
In this episode of Worthy of Wealth, I dive deep into:
Why comparison derails more entrepreneurs than almost anything else
The specific comparison trap for each Human Design type (and why you keep falling into it)
How I went from bitter and burnt out to building a sustainable business in three months
The difference between measuring success by energy versus outcomes
How to stay in your lane when comparison tries to pull you out of it
Listen Now:
What's Next?
Ready to build a business that actually works with your energy instead of against it? Let's talk about Purpose to Profit—my 16-week program where we build your signature offer and launch strategy from complete alignment with your Human Design. Book a free call here.
About the Author:
Matalya Onuoha is a Human Design Strategist and Clarity-to-Prosperity Guide for Women & Teams. She helps women transform confusion into clarity and purpose into prosperity using Human Design, NLP, and somatic techniques. Host of the Worthy of Wealth podcast.
